Hubby sent me this link: http://www.gizmodo.com/gadgets/gadgets/skymaul-happy-crap-you-can-buy-from-a-plane-218771.php
Too bad it’s a fake catalogue – I would have bought this:
Dec2
Tag Archives: Humor
Nov3
Happy Halloween, Sinners!
Well, slowly but surely the kids are making inroads into their halloween candy.� We found something a bit unusual in one of the bags, though. . .
YOU’REGOINGTOHEEEELLLLLLLL! Have some chocolate!
It goes on about the usual stuff – darkness, moaning and groaning, already seems like an eternity on days one, three, and six, none of your friends are there, nobody’s really in a party mood anyway, etc. I tell you, it’s really all about a loving, forgiving god. I was feelin’ the lurve all the way through. But wait! You’re actually reading the tract! That means you still have time to change your ways! Yes, God, unlike that bastige Allah, allows you to accept Jesus as your personal savior right up to the end! In fact, if you act now and fill out the form on the back, you’re set!
You know, these people could have just turned off their porch lights if they don’t like Halloween. Sheesh.
Oct5
But You Have to Laugh. . .
I haven’t completely lost my sense of humor. I’m limited in what I can do, and in order to get to anything below waist level, I need to bend at the knees, back straight, or hold onto something for balance and leverage, or do a bend over on my right leg only, sticking the left out straight back. As I was doing this for what seemed like the umpty-millionth time in the bathroom (mmmm. . .coffeeeeee!!!) I was reminded that Carolyn told me last night that it looked like I was doing an arabesque, and so for today’s entertainment, I present to you. . .
THE POTTY BALLET!
Plie’! Grasp lid, and releve’!
Turn! Plie’! Sit!
(curtain closes for intermission while the mundane aspects are undergone)
Releve’!
Turn, arabesque, and flush!
Grasp lid, and plie’!
Releve’, turn, and don’t forget to switch off the light!
Thunderous applause!!!