It is always a stunning display of social ineptitude when n00bs enter the mts2 chatroom. I wonder – what motivates a person to assume the room was dead before they entered, or perhaps that it’s full of bored people waiting for strangers to come and engage them in conversation, hoping beyond all hope that someone will bypass the social banter and immediately call them into a private chat? What’s up with that? And are there actually people out there who will drop everything to chat with some stranger who wows them with the stunning opener, “hi”? If there are, they are probably also the same ones who buy V1a*ra over the internet.

So to you, chatroom n00b, I offer this mind-expanding scenario:

You’re in the library, having a nice quiet chat with your book discussion group. You’ve been meeting for quite some time now, and have not only enjoyed your time with the other members of the group, but even formed friendships with some of them outside of the library. Just as you’re about to debate the symbolism of the protagonist remembering his childhood near-drowning as his wife is leaving him, a dirty, smelly homeless guy walks into the room. He heads right for you, leans over the table, and sticks his face right up in yours, blocking your view of your companions with his mouth full of missing or discolored teeth. “HI!!!” he screams at you. You try to ignore him, but he keeps moving to recapture your attention. “HI!!! I SAID HI! TALK TO ME, YOU BITCH!!!”

You, chatroom n00b, jumping into a chat and immediately PM’ing strangers, are that dirty, smelly, homeless guy. Think about it.